I tried not to choke. I tried to remain calm and cool as I explained to her, for at least the tenth time, how things actually work in the real world. That what she thought the retail value of her collection was worth, would not be the same as what the BSRD from Chicago would think it was worth. That dealers are in business to make money and they need margin, they need to account for their time, they need to clean the records, put them on eBay, pay the fees, deal with fickle buyers who return items for no reason at all. That any buyer would have to transport the records, ship them, rent a truck to haul them, who knows.

I told her that my collection was 10 times better than hers and it wasn’t worth $500,000 and nobody would pay me $250,000 for my collection, under any circumstances. I told her that nobody I know of has that kind of money to lay out for records. I said to her, look, even in the best-case scenario, say your collection is “worth” $100,000 – which would be the retail value of all of the records if they were sold on eBay or in a store – even if the BSRD from Chicago looked at all of the records and thought the retail value was $100,000, which was a stretch, IMHO, he would take at least $20,000 right off the top for costs and risks, and if he paid you 50% you would be looking at $40,000 tops.

Nothing was penetrating. She was starting to read titles to me again, titles she’d already ready to me several times before, while hub was in the background yelling, once again, about how she shouldn’t get ripped off and how the Kenny Dorham 12-inch record on Debut was a great record and worth a lot of money even though I tried to explain that the Kenny Dorham Debut had not been originally issued as a 12-inch record and their copy was an OJC pressing worth about $10. All was to no avail.

Even though I was pre-approved by The Lovely Mrs. JC to spend up to $40,000 for the collection, I knew this would be a futile gesture in light of her grandiose expectations, so I wished her good luck and wished her out of my life and hung up the phone. I called Dan to tell him that there would be no deal and he said it was certainly for the better, no more dealing with this wacky lady, and he asked what her reaction was when I made the offer. I said I didn’t make any offer because I knew she wouldn’t accept it, but he convinced me to call her back, put an offer on the table and let the chips fall where they may. He didn’t believe she would get an offer higher than $40,000, and I didn’t believe it either, so I would make it, get rejected and leave it at that. Eventually, perhaps, she would come back to me after driving some other poor collector or dealer crazy with her loopy emails and endless phone calls.

So I called her back the next day. I haven’t even seen the records, I said. Even so, based on what she had told me about the condition, after all of the titles she had read to me on the phone and the nearly 30 pictures she had sent me over the course of two weeks, after all of that, I was prepared to offer her $40,000 for the records, rent a van and drive out to Rochester, five hours each way, pay her with a bank check, box the records, carry them down the three flights of stairs, load them into my car and drive off into the night, never to be seen or heard from again. In my mind, I did not view this as a firm commitment – after all, I hadn’t even seen the records – but I wanted to make it sound like this was my offer and it was real.

She reacted about as expected, not exactly insulted, but a bit incredulous. She explained, again, that she’d had this vision that she was going to sell this collection to me, that she wanted it to go to a real collector who would love and appreciate the music (BTW, I hear this all the time and it has never been true – everyone wants top dollar at the end of the day), but how could she accept $40,000 for a collection that was worth $500,000? She acknowledged that perhaps the BSRD from Chicago might not value the records as she would, but she believed he would offer at least $80,000 to $100,000 and, even then, she would have a hard time accepting. She asked me once again if there was a dealer I could partner with or some other way to get more money, but I told her that I thought $40,000 was an overly generous offer and I couldn’t, in good conscience, pay any more than that even if I had the money or a partner, which I didn’t.

Again, I wished her good luck, hung up the phone and breathed a huge sigh of relief. At this point, I didn’t even want the collection anymore, thinking about all the hassle of really renting a van, driving to Rochester, carrying the records down three flights of stairs, etc. What had started out as something that seemed like fun, had magically transformed into something that seemed like work. A lot of work. A few days later I sent Debby a follow-up email to close the loop because, at this point, I knew I was done. I didn’t want the collection anymore, didn’t want to deal with Debby anymore. This started another email string.

June 19, 2018. Email from Al to Debby. Subject: Good luck

Hey, Debby, Good luck, hope you get a good price for the collection. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions.

June 20, 2018. Email from Debby to Al. Subject: Re: Good luck

Thanks Al its what I am hoping for but honestly if he doesn’t offer what I think he should can I still contact you to see if you know someone in the record business who would be interested?  Plus he’s flying in and renting a car and in no way will all of these records fit in a car…impossible :)!!Take care and thank you for getting back! – Debby

June 20, 2018. Email from Al to Debby: Subject: Re: Good luck

Yes, of course. As I said last week, I’d love to have the collection, so if I can go in with a partner at a fair price, I’d definitely be interested.The thing I would be concerned about with him just having a car, is that he will only want the records he can sell for big bucks, and you will still have your condo loaded down with the rest. In your situation it’s definitely best to find someone who will take the whole collection. But maybe he’s renting a van and not a car. 🙂 — al

June 21, 2018. Email from Debby to Al. Subject: Re: Good luck

Thanks Al!  He said he will be here longer than an afternoon now and will hire others to take it if he has to.  Def don’t want to sell if he doesn’t take whole collection, hopefully this will be the case!  Also if he doesn’t offer a fair price I won’t do it either.  But its been hard living in here with them taking over everywhere is all! Thanks for your help with all of this and will be in touch…he’s not coming till two weeks from today. Take care, Debby

June 21, 2018. Email from Al to Debby. Subject: Re: Good luck

Hey, Debby. Thanks for keeping me in the loop. Has he mentioned how much he’s willing to pay and whether he can pay in cash? – Al

June 22, 2018. Email from Debby to Al. Subject: Re: Good luck

He said half of what they are worth but I think by his terms not mine :)!! No problem at all I like your feedback from all of this too.  I found some blue note records on lexington ave labels 10″ and a couple 12″ but they only have a plain tan cover with written listings of the record on it, would they still be worth something to someone? One is Gil Melle Quartet, Julius Watkins, Albert Ammons and Art Hodes…the 12″ ones there are a couple Bethlehem labels also. – Debby

June 22, 2018. Email from Al to Debby. Subject: Re: Good luck
The Gil Melle and Julius Watkins records without original covers might have some value, not much, and the Ammons and Hodes records would be very little, maybe $10 or $20 at most. — al

June 22, 2018. Email from Debby to Al. Subject: Re: Good luck
Ok thanks Al looked them up in book and it said 300-400 each but without covers wasn’t sure, thought blue note lexington ave label would be good…ok many thanks then!!– Debby

And that, my friends, was that.

Except it wasn’t. What happened next? Stay tuned for Part 6.

P.S. I know I said I would be done today, but this part of the story took longer than I expected and the grand finale will also take some time, so you’ll all just have to be patient to hear how it all ends up.